Tuesday, February 5, 2008

The Pearl Fishers

The Pearl Fishers

Hmmm. One thing I've learned about being on SL, is that there is a wide range of sexual taste and experience. What works for some of us doesn't do a thing for others. I've had more sex talk with other women than I've had in the rest of my life. Likes, dislikes, facts, fantasies and fictions. I know that many of the people I have been with are much older than I am, and have come out of sexless, or loveless, or vanilla plain, marriages. Many of my partners in sl haven't dated since before I was out of pony tails. Things were different back then. There is a great deal more knowledge out there, but a little bit of knowledge can be a dangerous thing.

One example that strikes me looking at rl porn poses. They are meant to expose. Now I can understand wanting to see the penetration, whether by a real cock, or by a toy. But poses that are meant to give a good camera angle aren't really designed for comfort. And that is just one example. The same is true with a lot of the sex stories that tend to run to what is the "suck and fuck" pattern. They don't ring true to my experience, and they certainly don't get the range.

One simple example is the clit. There are a huge range of feelings and a huge range of approaches. I've heard some girls who are so sensitized that they never want their pearls directly touched… it's just too ticklish. Others are VS, that's Vibrator Spoiled. A vibrator can induce orgasms so fast and intense that it is hard to stay conscious. Even a relatively ordinary one can produce a clitoral climax in a few minutes. And that means that regular oral sex isn't always enough to bring a VS girl off.

Now that's rl, avies are often very much like the person who runs them in this, because most people don't spend a good deal of time making their avie different in sexual stimulation. The exception being BDSM, where people often allow much higher pain tolerances for their avie. But for most cases, if it gets the player off, it is the right thing to do.

So let's talk about one reality. Only if a woman has had FGM will the clit just be out there and exposed. Instead there are three layers of wrapping and protection, the "mons pubis," or "mons veneris," that's where the pubic hair is. There are lots of nerves there and since it is fatty, it presses backwards and is soft, then there are the labia majora or the outer lips, and the prepuce, or hood. And in general, sexual stimulation involves you using these veils to send sensation into the center. So instead of just stripping the panties off and putting tongue to clit, try a little tenderness.

That means instead of "I lick your swollen clit," if the level of foreplay has been low, start with the mons. "I like my way down through your soft bush," is a bit direct, but it's a start. Pet me, stroke me, tease me. The second step is applying the softness of the outer lips. There aren't any bones in there, and they don't get hard, though they do get, hmmmm warm. Pressing the outer lips inward to start to awaken the clit and other more sensitive parts, is definitely sexy. Think about rl sex. How often have you rubbed your manhood against, pants, panties, or just dry skin. It's not just that we are keeping you waiting, it is that it feels good.

Then there's a moment. There is a reason why cultures all over the world call parts of the female anatomy "petals" that's because they open. There's even a whole Romance about "the opening of the rose." When the outer lips get swollen, the open more and more. That's when it is time to shift to the hood or prepuce. Oral, manual, penile, they can all be good. For some of us, direct oral other stimulation on the clit is next, for others, it's a bit ticklish.

So instead of rushing to hit the spot, realize that this is more like opening of the veils. Different partners are going to be different. Sometimes it's fun to act out the runny slut who's just aching to be slammed in the service hole. But often, it's not. And Johnny one note, doesn't get to play as often.